sensitive issue to talk about? right?
my brain is telling me that it's okie but why do i feel so...
I look back into time and wonder... is it so hard to keep it strong?
trying to be everyone's goody goody... trying not to hurt people... being nice... ...
Instead of getting what I hope to get, I was being pulled down and stabbed...
been thrown into a place of darkness... dissappointment...
I digged every information from my brain... every experiences from the pass...
trying to learn and understand... how should I go and where should I step...
forming a new "survival skill dictionary"... applying them into my life...
first thought I was safe,... sooner later, my heart ache more than ever...
so blank right now... empty... and tired... finding and searching ...
I need help?? yes, i do?? or is this life??... tired tired...
deep down inside, i'm screaming... shouting... why...

stop telling me that this is life... I need to accept it?maybe... life meant to be like that... right?

 Last Sunday, it was beach day for us. I went to 2 beaches within one day with my coursemates and some of my seniors. It turns out to be the "most-fun-day" ever since I reach Newcastle. The sea was nice with not-so-big waves and i enjoyed playing in the sea despite of drinking a lot o "Nutrituinous water". Oh well, we surely can't avoid that.. AND to my own surprise, i actually enjoyed sun bathing.. I learnt to love the sun..I enjoyed lying on the sand under the sun without any shed on me... With the cool wind blowing, I nearly fell asleep on the beach. It was really a great experiance.. Regretably, I forgot to bring my camera!!! luckily one of us had it.. and so this is a photo of Shu Lin, Vee Lyn and I  on the beach.

Oh ya, this was also the first time i wore bikini on a beach..oh well, not exactly a bikini. but bikini with shorts. and it's because my clothes were wet and the wind was strong and they don't want me to catch a cold so.... ya..